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Because I loved you


 
 
 
 
 
 


I cannot hold your hand this year, I cannot share that memory. I cannot pour a drink for you or walk the beach where we both walked. I cannot laugh as we both laughed or dance a night time’s life away, sure we have eternity
I cannot hold your arm this year, and steady you across the road, two old people braving time and laughing at futility. I cannot travel back with you, glass in hand to memories when, young at heart, we hid our  insecurities. I cannot see you in the room, smiling as you always did, at some transgression in our midst, or drive too fast down country lanes or swim where reckless people swim: ignoring safety was our pride.
We always got away with it: made it to the other side; but are you are gone and I am here, stripped of context by my age, a mystery in this sheltered home, now without my family. I cannot hold your hand this year.

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  1. Yes, as you say, heart-wrenching. Thanks for re-posting.

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